Tuesday, April 13, 2010


I'm not normally an angry person.  I'm glad, too, because it takes a lot of energy.  I got angry this week over some personal issues, and I learned a few things. 

First, anger affects the way I relate to everything and everyone.  It doesn't just affect my relationship with person I'm angry with.

Being angry changes the way I see everything.  Fun things are not as fun.  Beauty is not as beautiful.  I cannot think very clearly when I'm angry.  I have to measure my words, and my thoughts seem to swirl in my head, defying me to express them.  And that's how I feel talking to a complete stranger.

Being angry makes me tired.  I get exhausted when I'm angry.  I need a lot of sleep anyway, and anger makes it even worse. 

It takes a long time for me to get angry, but when I get there, I tend to camp out.  My anger is always so righteous; I like to enjoy being so right when someone else is so wrong.  (symptom of unclear thinking)  Eventually reality sets in, and I see that I have to move beyond my anger.  Often I realize that I wasn't nearly as right as I thought.

I can't imagine living every day angry, like some people seem to do.  I don't think I could get enough sleep. 

It feels good to move beyond anger and return to joy.  That's where I really want to camp out.  The joy of the Lord is our strength, said Nehemiah.  No wonder I was so tired.