Facebook Love and Hate

Yes, I've been sucked in to reading just a few more posts on Facebook. It takes willpower to click away. Of course the younger folks have long ago abandoned FB. When old people like me got on board, well, FB became passé. They like Instagram, Snapchat, and other platforms that I don't even know about.

But back to Facebook. I have this deep ambivalence about using it. I feel somewhat accomplished when I go a whole day or more without checking my feed. I feel like I'm more hip, like all the young people. (But I almost never check my Instagram account because, frankly, I just don't get it. It seems much more like a waste of time to me than FB.)

I feel like I have conquered the addiction when I close out that FB tab. Ha ha! I escaped!

But then, I like to know what's happening with friends. I like to see if they have kids or grandkids to be proud of. I like to see when young folks graduate or get engaged. I like to keep up with the news, even sad news, and often follow up when I learn something on FB. I do try to scroll on by the cute kitten videos. Way too many of those.

When it comes to my own posts, of COURSE I like to be liked. I like to be noticed. I like for people to make the extraordinary effort of clicking a button below my picture. Talk about affirmation! But I feel guilty for checking up on my likes. Why do I care so much about other people's approval? Shouldn't I be above all that?

And how engaged should I really be here? Do I want to saturate FB with pictures of every bite of every meal? Or do I want to be a stalker who never posts, rarely likes others' posts?

And then there's the threat of FB (and all the other FAANG firms) knowing soooo much about me. They think they know all about my buying habits. Sometimes they actually get it right. But I like to keep them guessing. Take that you vicious algorithm!

So, for me, there is both love and hate of Facebook. I just don't want to be controlled by some computer. My New Year's resolution about Facebook? Don't really have one. I'll just keep on loving and hating.

"In your Face(book)"

Every now and then I may rant on Facebook.  But I prefer to use it as a way to connect, not a platform for axe-grinding.

Day by day I find "in your face" updates and links posted by FB friends. 

See, this politician is stupid.
See, this study proves that I am right.
See, all you people who approve/disapprove of gun control (or whatever) are ruining lives.

I have opinions, often strong opinions, but I'm not sure that Facebook is an effective means of persuading anybody.  It lends itself to shallow arguments and labeling.

We do need to exchange ideas on the internet and in person.  We should freely state our opinions.  But we need to be careful not to belittle people in any medium.  Even the dumbest ideas are held by reasonable people.  They won't be persuaded otherwise by being told they are dumb, but by careful, compassionate exposure to truth.

We need to debate ideas, not ridicule people
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