Happiness Science

Today's newspaper features an article in the Life section, "Understanding the science of WHAT MAKES US HAPPY."  http://www.greensboro.com/life/happiness-advantage-over-age-is-vanishing-study-finds/article_8b115bcb-1ba3-59b1-8307-aa4282961282.html  The article refers to a study which indicates that today's 30+ generation fears that they will not find as much happiness with age as previous generations found.

Allow me to make some observations.

• Neither the study nor the article tells us much about the "science" of happiness.  It merely reports statistics about people's reported happiness and expected happiness.
  
• To a large degree, the article correlates happiness with material wealth.
  
• Efforts to study happiness scientifically seem to reduce happiness to a formula, typically including material wealth, physical health, convenience, education, and relationships. 

Some elements of happiness, however, cannot be measured.  It is mysterious.  Certainly health and convenience can contribute to happiness, but it hinges on attitude more than anything else.  The way we choose to perceive life allows us to be happy.

Ironically, if we pursue happiness, we may not find it.  Being self-centered rarely makes one happy.  So, as we put others first, and choose a good attitude, we experience happiness as a byproduct.  I don't think you can put that into a formula.

Self Deception

It happened again.

Yesterday I had a great idea for a blog.  It was a simple, straightforward idea, something that matters, something that people would care about, something that I could say from my heart. 

This time I would not forget.  How could I?  It was so clear, so obvious, so heartfelt.  It did not need to write it down.  Sure I had forgotten such ideas many times before.  But not this time.

Why do I lie to myself?  Sigh.

My good intentions and stellar memory were not enough.  At least in this instance I recognize the lie.  May God grant me insight to see the other lies I tell myself.

As I see those lies revealed, it astounds me.  How could I be so deceived?

Happy November!

Now that November has arrived, our culture turns to thoughts of thanks. 

Yes, there is "No Shave November."  I just looked that up, and learned that not shaving has a cause.  By not shaving, men (and women?) seek to start conversations about cancer.  As I think about those who have engaged in this cause, they have probably told me about cancer experiences.  The money saved by not shaving should be donated to No Shave November, which shares proceeds with The American Cancer Society, St. Jude's Children's Hospital, Prevent Cancer Foundation and Fight Colorectal Cancer.  Learn more at https://www.no-shave.org/.

There is also Nanowrimo, http://nanowrimo.org/, encouraging fiction writers to buckle down and crank out 50k words this month.  Sometimes writers need that extra encouragement to push through writer's block.  Many writers face the tension of having something to say, but not grinding it out on paper.  That's a lot of work.  But the best writers fight past the blinking cursor and dull syntax to breathe life into their ideas.  After all, God uses words to create.

But overall, our society thinks about thankfulness in November.  At Crossroads yesterday, we hung a large Thankfulness Sheet--an actual bed sheet--on the wall, encouraging people to write down what they are thankful for.  It will hang there all month, inviting written or drawn expressions of thanks.  I can't wait to see it full of gratitude!

So, whether you write or shave or not this month, please be thankful.  More than that, express your thanks to God and people. 

Gratitude builds relationships and that's what life is all about, Charlie Brown.

Core Values in a Sentence

We often need reminders.  The most important reminders bring us back to the most important matters.  Here are the core values of Crossroads, each condensed into one sentence.

Simplicity

We avoid clutter and complexity to remember that God has made us for relationship with himself and others.

Community

It is not good to be alone, so we embrace the joys and challenges of connecting our lives with others, reflecting the relationships within God himself—Father, Son, and Spirit.

 

Action

Life is more than theory, so we apply belief to life, living out the teachings of the good news in daily life and corporate ministry.

Joy

We choose gladness, as Jesus reminds us that he has overcome this world, releasing us to be fun and to have fun.

Yogi's Joy

I was sad to learn today of the passing of baseball great Yogi Berra.  His joy seemed contagious.  I never saw him play, not even on TV.  And I don't watch much baseball anyway.  (Hey, the playoffs are coming soon.  It's time for me to tune in.)  And I've never been a Yankees fan.

Life experiences helped Yogi keep baseball in proper perspective.  He served in the U.S. Navy during World War II, and fought in the D-Day invasion in 1944.  He had seen real war, and likely faced down death.  That's the perspective he brought to his game.

He set all kinds of baseball records and won many World Series.  But his joy stands out as an enduring legacy.  In nearly every picture published today, he grins ear to ear.  This smile radiates from his soul.  It's not posed, not faked.  You can tell.  He's at ease with himself and the world.


Yogi never took himself too seriously.  He took baseball just seriously enough.  That gave him the freedom to see the world through child-like eyes.  His contradictory proverbs have become part of the American lexicon.  In one of my favorite stories, a family was touring a museum exhibit about Berra, when they happened upon the man himself.  They implored him to share a bit of Yogi-wit.  Berra was taken aback with such a request.  He responded, "I can't just make 'em up on the spot like that.  If I could make 'em up like that, I'd be famous."

Rest in peace Lawrence "Yogi" Berra.  If we could have joy like that, we wouldn't care about being famous or any of the small things.

Open Door to Heaven

Sometimes when I pray, it feels cold and rote.  I try to engage God, and maybe I do.  It's hard to tell.  Often God has a hard time getting my attention, even though I intend to pray. 

Then there are times when I feel like the door to heaven is open, and I commune intimately with the Lord.  I enjoy him.  I feel like I'm in touch with him.  This world makes sense through his eyes.  I know that he knows me, and it's all OK.  It is such blissful harmony.  The time feels so productive, because he has renewed my soul.  He has heard my pleas, and given me answers.

What makes one prayer time so engaging and effective, while the other prayer time is just flat?  On my end, I may be tired or worried or distracted.  I may be discouraged or lazy.  These mental states will obviously hinder my communion with the Lord.

But could God also close the door of communication?  The Bible records stories in which faithful disciples felt far from God.  Elijah and Job come to mind.  God could make communication difficult for me in order to test me.  Will I remain faithful, even when prayer seems useless?

Many spiritual giants through the ages have experienced "dark nights of the soul."  During these times, the disciple seeks to enter God's presence, but something isn't right.  The disciple may confess, repent, take inventory, and still feel distant from God.

The more I pray, the more times I feel connected with him.  But I realize that there may be times when--for his own reasons--God makes that connection more difficult.

Will I keep on loving and adoring him, even when there is no immediate, obvious reward for reaching out to him?

Pain in the Process

As time marches on, and good things happen, there is pain, good pain, in the process.  The pain is good because it takes me deeper in relationship all around.  I love my wife more, I love my children more, I love my Lord more.  I could never get there without the pain.  I am getting there, learning, growing, coping, stretching.